About

These writings are inspired by my ongoing healing journey from sexual trauma to sexual-spiritual awakening. They are teasers for a larger book on the subject entitled The Smell of Water, (forthcoming.) Sexual trauma is so ubiquitous in our culture of violence, commodification, consumerism, dominion over nature, ownership of sovereign beings, divorce from our bodies and spirit, patriarchy, and an adversarial competition between the sexes. Sexual trauma has the effect of collapsing our humanity into a pale, one-dimensional rendering of what sex really is, what we really are, and all that is possible.

My healing has involved a reclaiming of my subjectivity, humanity, and multi-dimensionality from a place of sexual objectification… a dark, desolate, painful, and impoverished experience of sex. We all have the power to discover within sex: love, aliveness, freedom of expression… access to the whole spectrum of human emotion… Queering. Creativity. Play. Reconnecting with childhood parts. Re-activation of the sexual energy, exploration, and vitality that was present in childhood. Soul retrieval. Self-definition of our own experiences. Agency. Pleasure in pain. Beauty in trauma. Dynamism. Autonomy. Sovereignty. Boundary-dissolving. The delicious mess of enmeshment. Poetry in addiction. Loss of self. Reclamation of self. Safety. Darkness. The power of darkness. Shadow work. Desire. Seduction. Animal instincts. Shame. Alchemizing shame. Deviance. Humanizing others. Compassion. Self-compassion. Forgiveness. Inter-being. Intimacy. Complexity. Reconciliation, healing, and union between the sexes. Alter-egos. Altered states. Vulnerability. Spirit. Time-travel. Shape -shifting. Sacred anger. Power. And more…

I hope that these writings convey all of that, for your own inspiration and soul activation.

These writings lie at the intersection of sexual healing and erotica. And they have meaningful justice implications. Sexual healing is part of decolonizing our bodies, minds, and hearts. These writings illustrate coming back to the dynamism and liberation that is our natural state.

This blog weaves dark and light. The sacred and the profane comingle, reconciling in nonduality. These writings are an embrace of all the coexisting contradictions that we are. The mystery is so much more dynamic than we are led to believe, and sex is a portal to discovering that. Sex is a culmination of the most intimate, vulnerable, and powerful. We in the western world are taught to fear altered states and power (real spiritual power, that is). Meanwhile, indigenous societies worldwide revere real power and altered states of consciousness. May we become unafraid of our power. May we learn how to commune deeply with the mystery that we are. May we learn how to surrender to our deepest feeling states safely, while developing agency, self-awareness, and accountability. May we have conscious relationships. May we bring the taboo out of the shadows and feel the universality of our rich humanity. For what is taboo and stigmatized is the richest, most vital, and creative force.